Animal Guide

I was sitting on the patio in my cozy reclining camp chair with a book and a blanket when a tiny green and brown hummingbird buzzed towards me and hovered in mid air, only a few feet away. He seemed to be looking right at me, evaluating me. As we exchanged glances, I noticed that his wings moved so fast, I couldn't even see them. They were two blurs on either side of his body, almost like shadows. After a few seconds, he flitted off to the fuchsia bush where he navigated with extreme precision between the branches and leaves, carefully inspecting each and every blossom for nectar.

Whenever I have a personal encounter with an animal, it's like I've made a new connection, as if we've shared something together and learned from one another. Some Native Americans believe that each animal offers a specific type of "medicine" or energy. Hummingbird medicine is about adaptability, navigating easily through obstacles, rolling with changes, and finding the joy in life. That's a great lesson, but also a challenge.

I had a conversation with a co-worker today about my difficulty adapting to big changes. I need a true north. I get frustrated when I don't have something solid and concrete to hold on to. It's often the bane of my existence at work, where things change faster than I can cope. I sometimes catch myself wishing things could just go back to the way they were two years ago, when I had my own space and I worked on the things I care about.

I don't think it's wrong to reminisce about good times in the past, but sometimes holding on just holds you back. I would like to get better at accepting change. Maybe one day I'll be able to navigate with precision like that little hummingbird.

Bad Cell Phone Photos for Jennicula (again)

I've been on an extended hiatus from blogger, and aside from this little post, I may stay there a while longer. I just haven't felt like writing.

I've been working, hanging out at home, playing WoW, watching movies, going to choir rehearsal... all the usual things for me. I've applied for two different new positions within my company - I hope I get one of them. My husband just started his last term of school for this year. We're getting ready to put up a new fence around the back yard, as the old one fell down in the last big storm. And this summer we'll be putting a new roof on the house.

But the more fun and important news is that I saw MCR on Friday, and it was awesome. I took my husband and my friend Katie. We all had a blast.

Bad cell phone photos are here:
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=95590&id=1667793467&l=31779f3728

I don't know when I'll be back here. Maybe I'll feel more inspired after I change jobs. We'll see...