The Weirdest Dream of All

Saturday morning, I had the strangest dream I've had all week. In order to explain, I must first provide some background information.

I have this coworker who I don't particularly like or respect. The guy's just basically an idiot. He's not very smart, he's not very good at anything, yet he brags about his abilities and tries to achieve things that are far beyond his capability or authority. He thinks he knows what needs to be done, and he thinks he's the best person to do it. He always schmoozes with the managers, trying to sell his point of view, but he rarely accepts help or input from anyone else. He takes credit for other people's work. When asked what he's been working on, he talks about other people's projects more than his own. He rarely has anything tangible to show for his hours of work, and when he does, it's typically of poor quality. He sucks at his job, and doesn't really like doing it anyway, so he invents other job duties that are more interesting while ignoring the responsibilities he was actually hired for.

Recently, he weaseled his way into a new position. He's supposed to gather requirements from the users, ask the right questions of the right people, document what he's learned, and pass the documentation on to the developers for design and construction. Sounds like an easy job, right? Talk to people, get information, write it down and pass it on. He's been in the job for over 6 weeks now, and he hasn't produced a single finished document. I have a list of projects in my queue that I can't start working on because I don't have any requirements documentation from this guy. When I ask my manager if I should start gathering my own requirements so I can have something to work on, he says no, no, that's this guy's job.

This guy makes me so angry and bitter on a daily basis. I've never in my life wanted a specific individual to quit or get fired. I've always believed that a job is only as good or bad as you make it, and you should concentrate your efforts on your own area instead of focusing on what someone else is doing. But in the last 2 years this guy has changed all that. He constantly steps into my area, forcing me to pay attention to him when I'd really rather mind my own business, do my job, and go home.

Very, very frustrating.

Wow, did I spend enough time bitching about this guy? I'm sure we all know someone like this. If you don't, you will some day. If you never do... then you're very lucky.

So this dream...

I dreamt that I went to a bar - and it was sort of a Serenity/Firefly atmosphere, like half old west, and half futuristic sci-fi. I sat down at a random seat, close to the door because I was waiting for someone to meet me.

After a few minutes, I realized I was sitting right next to this guy from work. How did I not notice him when I first sat down?

He was drinking, and he was completely tanked. He didn't notice me right away, and I hoped it would stay that way. But sure enough...

"Andrea!" Drunkenly, "What are you doing here?"

Tersly, "I'm meeting someone."

He sloppily threw his arms around me, totally violating my personal space, and ended up with his hand resting uncomfortably on my chest -- not in an intentional groping sort of way, but in a so drunk that he's completely unaware sort of way.

"Um... are you aware that your hand is on my boob?"

Frowning unhappily, "It is?" Looking at my chest, "Oh." Removes arms and falls back into his own space. Orders another pitcher.

A few minutes pass, and he starts talking to me like we're all buddy-buddy. In real life, he does this once in a while - just starts spewing information that I didn't ask for. In my dream, he started talking about how much work sucks, and how he hates it there. Whenever he talks about this in real life, I think it's ironic, and it's hard for me to respond positively because in my view, a lot of the misery at work is his fault. It was the same in my dream.

Then things took an even weirder turn. He falls all over me again (no hand on the breast this time), and starts telling me a sob story about his marriage falling apart.

Now... I know his wife in real life. All of my coworkers love her. She's intelligent, attractive, good at everything she touches, and very easy to talk to and hang out with. She's a great girl. None of us can figure out how this guy landed a wife like her. She is talented in all the ways he's not.

So to have him start telling me about their marriage problems in my dream was very, very odd. He drunkenly spilled everything that's been going on with them, in addition to all his opinions about work. The whole time, I was torn between halfway caring and feeling sympathy, and halfway ignoring him because I think he's an asshole who deserves whatever he gets. I also kept checking the door for my friend who was supposed to meet me, thinking "god, I hope he doesn't come in here and see this guy hanging all over me. There would be so much ridicule... he'd never let me live it down."

That's the gist of it.

Now I'm a little curious about what's going on in the guy's life. Was this an insightful dream where my perception is closer to the truth than I realize? Or did my subconscious mind create another fiction, no different from any other dream? Maybe it was a psychological means of making myself feel better by imagining that I'm not the only one at the office who is struggling both professionally and personally? Maybe it was even designed to make me feel sympathy for this guy and realize that he is human too, even though I find him to be vile and repulsive.

Whatever it was, it got me thinking.